Nobody wins a war.

What the hell is going on in Eastleigh? And Kasarani? And why is no one in authority talking about it, other than giving us meaningless quotes about security operations? Are there people, possibly Kenyans, being held in ‘detention centres’? How is ‘detention centre’ a phrase I use in this our Nairobi, in 2014? Are we […]

Continue reading →

Idiot Press: The Nation Edition.

We need to have a conversation about the Saturday Nation. You buggers, what the hell is going on? I need to give you a bit of background before I continue, that you may fully grasp from whence my anguish emanates. I’ve been reading the Nation since I could read. My father, bless his demanding ass, […]

Continue reading →

Dear Mr President

Dear Mr. President Come take a walk with me Let’s pretend we’re just two people and You’re not better than me I’d like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly… The end is nigh, no? Yes, as it turns out, the end may in fact be nigh, unless someone gets off his […]

Continue reading →

Manage ya trois.

You know your life has taken a turn for the downright peculiar when you find yourself googling threesomes on a Saturday night, when you’re all alone.  I’m not talking about searching for dirty pictures and hot, I mean, nasty videos, I’m talking about looking for ’how to’ manuals, as in, how to have a threesome. […]

Continue reading →

Day of love, my ass!

Valentine’s Day is bollocks. It is. I could end this post here and I’d have made my point, surely no one can contest this most obvious fact. What’s that?  You don’t agree?  You must be the delusional one shopping for a suitably fluffy gift of (not too) great value.  And then there’s the wine, the […]

Continue reading →

Sex, Lies and BS.

Have you heard?  Sex makes us smarter.   Excellent, no?  This is the best news I’ve received this year.  However, and there must always be a however whenever you read something on the internet, I should probably investigate this woman’s claims, just to make sure this isn’t another one of those ‘quail eggs prevent AIDS’ […]

Continue reading →